Sunday, November 8, 2009


I open my home to my good friend Jimmie and what does he do? Not just once (first on my birthday, which was really the ultimate insult) but TWICE - he beats me at the Audience Haiku Challenge at the Live Wire! Radio show.

Me trying to be a gracious loser

We both wrote to the theme "Mothers."
Jimmie's entry:
I love my mother
But she didn't breastfeed me.
That is why I'm gay.

I was tipped off that including something about boobs might get me a winner, so I went with this:
The nice moms smile sweet;
But bad ones show some cleavage.
Join the P.T.A.!

Sigh. Then my secret Live Wire! boyfriend ignored me (though my favorite writing workshop teacher Greg Robillard who does not think I'm a stalker used his back for signing my poster) and my cleavage.

But I had a delectable dinner before the show at Berlin Inn, and my delovely friend Holly & her family saved front row seats, and everything else about the evening was enjoyable.

The young handsome young talented band
The Lonely Forest from near my hometown
made up for my disappointment

I might invite Jimmie back for the December show; I'll have crutches then to beat him with if he wins again.


Fantastic Forrest said...

When I read this first, I thought Robillard signed your cleavage. Then I realized there was a parenthetical in the sentence and dropped that out and it made sense. After all, I'd seen no signature on your bosom when you returned from the signing. But my interpretation was funnier.

Maybe next month, write the haiku on your boobs and submit yourself.

Sam said...

Congrats to you! I think if I tried to write a Haiku, my brian would explode AND I would have a hangover anyway form the alcohol I would need to lubricate my creative juices. Anyway didn't you friend have one less of the needed syllables on the final line?

stephanie said...

Ms. Forrest - I rather like your interpretation as well...And I just freaking might take your advice next month.

Sam - I appreciate your congratulations and for having my back; I incorrectly wrote my friend's last line. TOTALLY not on purpose...

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

Perhaps a performance art haiku incorporating the crutches will finally slay your competition.

shrink on the couch said...

I just might have voted for Jimmie, too.. that is too funny!

Very Mary said...

Admittedly, I thought you had your cleavage signed as well. I'm with Fantastic Forrest. How could you possibly go wrong with haiku on your girls?

LarryG said...

It is so interesting that the two haiku's not only are about boobs (had me at hello) but are also "AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL"!

snugglebug said...

Those haiku are so funny! I thought yours was just as good!

JCK said...

Oh, my. I thought he signed your cleavage, as well. Too funny.

Your friend's Haiku did make me laugh out loud. Very funny.

Danielle said...

I too also thought you had your cleavage signed. I was most impressed.
I liked both haikus but yours should have won.


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