gold medal delusionist

I have a new secret Olympian boyfriend. Actually, it's not so secret considering I have very publicly stalked him in a mildly embarrassing Ellen Barkin-Cougarish way via Twitter and Facebook.

Anyway.

I will not attempt to convey the depth of my reasoning because everyone to whom I've tried to explain how I appreciate his journey & dedication & philosophy has given me a patronizing raised eyebrow and condescending nod, so forget it. Let's just say I think he's intelligent and thoughtful...and hottastic.

But once I discovered that he diligently responds to his Twitter followers, I became determined to make an impression. Partly out of a middle-aged-woman attempt to feel less than ancient & irrelevant, and partly because I do truly believe he has wisdom to offer my students (and most teenagers) who are often floundering & uncertain about how to keep moving in life. Anthony Ervin has told his story in Rolling Stone and has put himself on the world's stage in ways that are both self-promoting & altruistic; neither is a negative thing, frankly.

I am not quite old enough to be his mother yet enough years ahead to be his capable babysitter. Plus, I am happily married 19 years to a fantastic guy. Yet, I am not blind nor dead. I am beyond caring whether people believe my intentions, and am not too proud to admit one of them is the hopeful hope that he will appear at my school in the flesh for a commencement speech. And allow me to gently touch his forearm at least once. I have a strange thing for swimmers' arms.

Anyway, again.

He's a good guy, Anthony Ervin, even if all he ever does for me is Tweet some inspirational quotes for my wayward students and feign interest in visiting Portland (done). He has gone astray in his life, experimented in ways that he is not proud of [raise your hand if you can identify], and has made efforts to seek inspiration & redemption.

If he hadn't already earned a gold medal, I'd offer one for that.

And for his arms.

major love

My cyberfriend & fellow bargain stalker/crafty mama [though she's far far craftier than I, which is why I purchase her stuff for my classroom]/English teacher/wordsmith Very Mary and her friend Jen have set up a website to raise money for a fellow blogger/crafter who is at the moment facing treatment for kidney cancer.

You can read the back story and details at Maggie Grace Creates and healing maggie grace.

You can get in on the next couple of raffles for delightful, delectable donated goodies.

You can give straight-up cash that's been languishing in your pocket.

But what you really want to do is feel the love flowing between these three gracious women and the rest of cyberspace ~ it's magic, kismet, ju-ju, faith, karma, grace. Being in its presence feels so good.

about me, yet not

The About Me part = I won a haiku contest! After being rejected snubbed egregiously overlooked by Live Wire! a couple of weeks ago, the funky new cause-friendly website Everywun recognized my enormous talent & rewarded my syllabic prowess with an Ecogear bag. Woot! To be fair, apparently there were other finalists chosen and I was lucky enough to have my name pulled from a drawing. But I'm continuing to believe I am the haiku goddess.

We were supposed to write our 5-7-5 about the importance of eco-friendliness. Here's what I said:

one earth for our use ~

air, creatures, plants, water, soil…

be friendly, won’t you?

Now back to this Everywun site. It's a cool concept [and I'm not just saying that because they proclaim me Amazing Poetry Mistress like me best are sending me a prize] - you get credits for taking quizzes about various causes (poverty, animals, health, education, enviroment) or surveys about timely topics or or putting a badge on your blog [you choose what you want to support; see mine in the sidebar] or other special actions they tell you about in an e-newsletter. You use your accumulated credits to donate items to specified charities - all from the comfort of your couch or desk chair. And FREE TO YOU.

This is one of those occasions when it's smart to go along with Everywun.

give us the chocolate cake

To all the heroic dads out there

via videosift.com

Happy Father's Day

FOUND heroes

I mentioned before that the FOUND guys were coming to my school and today they really & truly showed up! (Despite my perpetually upbeat perky attitude [shut up], I can be a closet pessimist and when I didn't hear back from them about publicity a couple of weeks ago and didn't see them anywhere near our parking lot an hour before today's scheduled show, I got a little sweaty).

me with Peter & Davy Rothbart after the show
(Davy is totally not touching me inappropriately, swear)

Why I think Peter & Davy are heroic:

• They turned this peculiar hobby of collecting 'found' items into a creative & genuinely entertaining venture
• They drive (yes, drive) around the country visiting towns large & small, venues major & minor (like us!)
• They perform at schools for free
• They're super cute & talented [fine public speakers plus Peter writes songs, sings, & plays guitar gloriously] AND extraordinarily polite to teenagers & grown-ups alike

I think of them as grown-up versions of some of our more quirky/brilliant students who are at our school because they don't fit particular checklists of What To Become. It warmed my heart to see so many of our kids enjoying the performance and believing that it's really & truly okay to follow a different path.

If you are near any of their upcoming stops, you MUST go see them. This is a Bad Mom mandate; tell them I sent you.

And none of this praise is due to the fact that Davy pretended to be singing & blowing kisses to me during "The Booty Don't Stop" song. Though it definitely made my middle-aged day and makes me want to link their site one more time...

for those about to walk (or run, or zumba)

I believe that every human has a finite number of heart-beats. I don't intend to waste any of mine running around doing exercises. -- Buzz Aldrin

I'm with Buzz, at least until my clothes stop fitting or my doctor says "Really, you should move something occasionally." But from the comfort of my La-Z-Ass recliner, I do admire those who get themselves into shape; I've even made some whispered remarks about maybe joining some of them this summer when my life miraculously transforms into a delight of Efficient Time Management.

Until then, join me in three cheers for these lovely, fit ladies:

Lisa at MamaMilton

Shana at So Not Zen

Miss Burrows at A.R. and Proud

And if you rock the exercise world as well, shout it out in comments. I salute you.

at your cervix

My best friend Jen was told by her gynecologist last week that her cervix is 'unusually firm' for someone her age [which is a number of years younger than me; must remember to ask my gyno to evaluate my cervix next month...]. We called that reason to drink lots of wine celebrate, and I announced that she qualifies as one of my heroes this month.

Jen is a hero not only because of her extraordinary lady parts - she is a mom of 3 boys (that exhausts me just typing it), works in the special ed classroom at our kids' school (doubly exhausted now), and is a genius wingwoman. I am eternally blessed that she moved in across the street nearly six years ago; we immediately connected and were offering each other deep conversation & afternoon cocktails tea within a week. Despite her shocking Republican status, our friendship has grown & thrived as each of us has individually.

We occasionally compete for cutest hair or best boob display [I usually win for sheer volume but her cleavage is always better; she's braver than I] or for the attentions of Certain Bartenders, but in the end we prefer to cheer each other's efforts & successes and be content with our simple, soul-boosting camaraderie.

Thank you for being a firm friend, Jen.

Cheers to good-looking cervices

obamarama

A convenient two-in-one post: I was asked by Mother Talk to review [via my kids] Obama: The Historic Journey, Young Reader's Edition by Jill Abramson PLUS Barack Obama happens to qualify for my NaBloPoMo "Heroes" theme by virtue of his persevering spirit from childhood to young adulthood and on through his recent adventures.

When I opened the package revealing our copy a couple of weeks ago, there was cheering from everyone. The kids took turns paging through it - Mason on the lawn while Paige finished her homework, then Paige at the kitchen counter while I made dinner. They read their favorite parts aloud - how the First Daughters are going to have sleepovers in the White House (I wish they were my friends!) - and implored me to looklooklook! at pictures of the young Barack and behind the scenes on Inauguration Day.

In the eyes and mind of this layout snob mom & teacher, the New York Times publication is visually stunning but not overdone; kid-friendly but not dumbed down. It mixes interesting facts about Obama's childhood & background with details about his rise to the presidency, adding a variety of photos to help kids relate to our President.

Respectfully written, treating young readers as intelligent citizens. I vote YES for Obama: The Historic Journey.

despite everything

her⋅o⋅  [heer-oh]
–noun
1.a person of distinguished courage or ability, admired for brave deeds and noble qualities.


Despite my lamentations about being busy & tired & cranky & stressed & tired & soreadyforsummerIcan'ttakeonemorethingtodo, I joined up for June's NaBloPoMo (which sounds so very very dirty if you have to say it aloud but I digress) because the theme is HEROES and it just tempted me so - I look forward to the challenge of finding 30 people I admire. [I'm hoping by the end of the month I can genuinely say I am one of my own heroes...heh].

Initial idea for Day 1 Hero? My mom. Now, anyone who knows me is aware that much of my mom's behavior drives me up a wall; I generally get excessively edgy when preparing to visit and almost always develop a violent headache during the visit.

Yet.

The things that make me crazy are essentially personality issues. The stuff that really matters, that makes one of distinguished courage or ability, admired for brave deeds, is this:

My mom bravely put aside her carefree youth to have me - a daughter whose gender drastically displeased her father-in-law; a daughter whose presence quickly proved too much a hassle for her young husband; a daughter who was dramatic & sassy headstrong & spoiled incessantly by next-door grandparents.

My mom worked diligently at tedious jobs, becoming the best dry cleaning presser/shipping clerk/cafeteria cook not because she always aspired to those things but because it is admirable to do your best no matter what. Everywhere she goes and everything she does has a lot to do with her thinking about other people.

Despite everything I find bothersome & disagreeable, in the end my mom is my first hero.