Saturday, September 15, 2007

holy hardened arteries, batman!

To assuage my unbearable fatigue & hunger last night, my husband & son talked me into visiting the world-renowned Der Wienerschnitzel. Mason was excited because it sounds so exotic; when we got there he asked, "So, what's a derr veenerrsnits-uhl anyway?" I got as far as "Well, 'der' means 'the' in German and...um...a schnitzel is...uh...pounded meat?" Surprisingly, I still walked through the door with an appetite.

I remember it being a big fun treat when I was a kid to eat at Der Wienerschnitzel because the nearest one was about 60 miles away, by the mall, and they had a Mustard Dog, which is exactly what it sounds like and the only way I ever wanted to eat a hot dog. It's still on the menu, along with 40 other non-hot dog items (none of which are a salad or vegetarian entree, however). I ended up with the Bacon Ranch Chicken Sandwich combo (#4), because I was in starvation mode by 6:30 p.m. Mason begged for a double cheeseburger with bacon but I talked him down from the ledge of childhood obesity by insisting he choose between the extra meat patty and the bacon. Stu had to have the Chocolate Nutter Butter Tastee Freez, which offends me on so many levels - its blatant misspelling of the words 'tasty' and 'freeze' not the least of them. And we had two orders of fries because I somehow thought we would go hungry with just one. It was 30 minutes of fatty bliss, accompanied by delightful bubble-gum pop music ("Eleanor, gee I think you're swell!").

The best part though? Napkins & cups emblazoned with this strange motto: "PUSHING THE BOUNDARIES OF TASTE". What marketing genius got that through? Of course, I'm not forgetting it. But Stu is a little irritated that they trademarked it before he could use it...Maybe I'll order him a t-shirt with that printed on it for the gym.