Monday, February 25, 2008

blackouts = god's friendly kick in the ass

Super short story: I passed out yesterday morning and had to spend dawn's early hours in the ER figuring out why. Which I didn't, really.

Hi, my name is Stephanie and I'm an overachiever.

Things I learned from a visit to the emergency room:

  1. Multiple individuals (not all badged professionals) get to see, probe, poke and otherwise manipulate various parts of my exposed body
  2. It's important to stay on top of the leg & armpit shaving (EKG stickers hurt more coming off when they bring copious amounts of hair with them)
  3. Food is not considered a basic necessity; no one offers it nor knows how to find it
  4. Some people there have jobs involving no medical knowledge whatsoever - one sunny young woman popped in to see if I was ready to go [three hours later] and when I said "Sure! How do I get out of this IV and heart monitor situation?" she looked puzzled, then asked how we'd like to pay for our ER visit
  5. Some people are at the emergency room against their will. Loudly. A nurse closed the door to my room (thus confusing me when I came back from the bathroom) because an individual had been wheeled in cursing loudly; there was concern about my kids hearing profanity. That's sweet.

Super Blackout Mom, at your service

The general scoop is that with my tendency toward low blood pressure, I am prone to spilling spells and must watch myself especially when stressed or sick or tired (hmm...let's just say, all the time). But my potassium was extraordinarily low, possibly due to four days of the nastiest flu in Dodge, and that will send a body down fast, too.

I like to look at this episode as God's not-so-gentle way of saying "TOO MUCH, FOOLISH HUMAN!" and "HOW'S ABOUT YOU EAT THE WAY YOU'RE ALWAYS BERATING YOUR FAMILY TO EAT?" and maybe "STOP WITH THE OCD ALREADY; GOOD ENOUGH WORKS." I like to think I'm the in-control one; that will have to change. Letting go.