Without benefit of a therapist, I am at the mercy of my own very flawed self-awareness each day. This means at any given moment, I can be bemusedly accepting of my OCDness or painfully distressed by my need to have all things Just Right, or frightfully surprised by a wild turn of mood, for good or wicked.
Bringing myself into balance means I have to reboot: I must find an entire day when I can start AND finish cleaning, straightening, & organizing everything that catches my eye and disturbs my sense of order. This can be unnerving at best - friends & family aren't quite sure what they can offer to help with, let alone touch or remark about; I am prone to growling and barking in the midst of this process.
I am trying to be less deranged about these obstinate needs of mine and have found that constant list-making helps, as well as the kindness of strangers [and familiars] plus deliberate attention to What Really Matters. I've designed a little photo essay detailing my progress so far (meaning, as of today, Day 3).
Bringing myself into balance means I have to reboot: I must find an entire day when I can start AND finish cleaning, straightening, & organizing everything that catches my eye and disturbs my sense of order. This can be unnerving at best - friends & family aren't quite sure what they can offer to help with, let alone touch or remark about; I am prone to growling and barking in the midst of this process.
I am trying to be less deranged about these obstinate needs of mine and have found that constant list-making helps, as well as the kindness of strangers [and familiars] plus deliberate attention to What Really Matters. I've designed a little photo essay detailing my progress so far (meaning, as of today, Day 3).
The List, made the night before and stationed in my bathroom so attention is directed early
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjoGhQH-S-cF5VJdRxU2h512iGr0_H4KcSq7a9oIF-dPzSiIfBJNLG75UeQqIMczzr4AHVxzE9ucUxSAvr-b6uAawxBJMDexSbnuv91l3j8UxIgW1zmMXfd0S4g2X6hmA9DJPj17lFhQXF1/s320/Love_Ya_Award%5B1%5D.jpg)
Loving recognition from a truly lovely gentleman
[I will follow the rules soon, Larry, promise!]