Saturday, August 1, 2009

seeking an outlet

Some people think beach = fun in the sand with family; Bad Mom is not some people [though I did spend an hour watching my kids play this morning, and I even put my bare feet in the sand for a minute]. My best friend & I found it necessary to do a little shopping at the local outlet mall after all that parenting.

I'm going to give away the ending here and reveal I did not spend a gross amount of money on fabulous items; in fact, I found it quite lacking in spectacular deals. Jen & I left, continuing a joke started last night when we spotted a "liquor outlet" - does that mean slightly off alcohol? Stu suggested we would find brands like "Smirinouff" and "Bacarmi." Jen decided that the Christian Outlet is where you get The Bible as Word of Gob; I said it was a store full of irreverent believers who think Jesus prefers certain sports teams, and is happy when we're at happy hour. Book Warehouse? Watch for missing chapters and/or upside down pages. And of course the Hollister outlet employs only average-looking boys & girls instead of the shockingly perfect droids the mall hires.

Whew, I am ready for a drink. Maybe a Cosmopolitan? Though it would only be a Bourgeois if purchased at the Liquor Outlet.