Sunday, July 29, 2007

off the wagon, moaning and bleeding

Hello, my name is Stephanie and I'm a shopaholic.
[Hi, Stephanie!]
________________________________
I would be lying if I said I didn't expect things to turn out this way. I know who I am. I knew the moment my best friend, who hates shopping almost as much as I hate water sports, asked if I would go with her to the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale, that I would be breaking The Compact. The sale started the day after we got back from Hawaii; she said she would be ready to go at 7am - would I? My heart raced. Yes! I would be! So what if I got into bed after midnight? I would be ready.

I told myself it would be my Jubilee Day, one time to buy with wild abandon like the American consumer I was born to be. Nevermind that I'd already had a Jubilee Day this year, when I temporarily lost my mind at GAP and Victoria's Secret last spring. That was different, I announced to my inner party pooper; I had coupons and I needed those things. It didn't really count.

We weren't able to go first thing on Friday because of a scheduling problem; I should have taken that as a sign to stay home. And my horoscope that morning actually read "Beware of making any impulse purchases today." But it just seemed too obvious to apply; it must mean something more symbolic. Like "Look before you leap" and "Don't put all your chickens in one bucket" or whatever - they don't really mean exactly what they say. So off we went to the mall at 3pm. I was giddy.

What I want to do right now is tell you all about the fantastic stuff I bought, and what great deals they were, but I know that's not the right thing to do. Like an alcoholic after a binge describing the smooth feel of the mochatinis in her mouth, I cannot talk about the soft ribbed knit of my new organic cotton sweaters and the fabulous businessy brown pinstriped pajama pants and...See! I'm so bad.

But I can't blame the whole trainwreck on my best friend, as much as I want to because she was the one who encouraged the pajama purchase (which included an adorable, soft-as-butter sand-colored hoody sweater so I can be warm AND fashionable with my laptop at 5am). I then deliberately took my GAP and Nordstrom credit cards to Portland last week when I dropped Mason off for his acting class. I had more coupons (damn you, bonus points!) and it was all tax-free but still, my children really did not need more socks and t-shirts. And a super cute pair of espadrilles that will fit Paige next summer...Stop it! Naughty naughty shopper.

On the positive side (there must be one, or else I would just wallow in guilt the rest of the summer. Though I would look stylish doing it...), I can pay for this spree with my final paycheck from teaching. Thank goodness for the crazy pay periods! Otherwise I would have to reconstruct that form I shredded...

Now I'm trying to figure out how to get back onto The Compact wagon, because I really do believe it's a more responsible way to live. It's just hard (I'm stamping my foot and frowning here). And I so like pretty clothes. New ones, with tiny gold safety pins holding leather tags...Somebody should slap me. Just don't make me bleed on my new Jag jeans.

4 comments:

Sharm said...

Hi there,

You are chosen to represent your country in the first international blog
WUB (World United Bloggers)

The aim of this blog is to prove to the world that differences in language, religion,race and nationality do not make us hate each other and we can make this world better if we express our opinions with respect to others.

If you agree to join us please send e-mail with your nick name , age , country and your blog address to sharm_lover@hotmail.com where you will be sent an activation mail which makes you entitled to contribute in WUB, your name as one of the contributor will automatically be updated.Please read the rules before you start any posting in WUB where you will also find the aims of this WUB.

Thanks
Chief WUB,


Sharm .

stephanie said...

mUm. About that ^

I'm thinking no?

Lisa Milton said...

Sounds good until, what? Sharm_LOVER?

Hmmm...

bliss said...

oh, yeah girl! shop til ya drop or until your plastic catches fire from being run through too many whatchamajingies. then when you're done, sharm_lover can rub your toes for you. '-)

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