Monday, April 21, 2008


Good morning, ladies & gentlemen! We're going to start boarding for our flight. Please take a look at your boarding pass and if you see the letter A on there, go ahead and line up along the windows here. Those of you with the letter B will be lining up in a few moments. Those of you with the letter C [barely suppressed snicker] should not even be listening to this announcement, losers. Why don't you just keep on typing away there on the floor while we fill up the aircraft with individuals who did, indeed, eat all they could at the Harrah's buffet and are now dragging their multiple oversized carry-on items into the space that used to be your seat?

Welcome aboard, suckers.